// superior my ass (in some order)
| 02/24/2005 - 6:29 p.m. |

thursday, 2-17-05, 4pm
(@ mc3, in-between classes)

just re-did the bench press in my st+c class.
21 reps = superior rating = superior on all 6 now =
overall strength rating: superior.
yeah, baby.

unfortunately, made no dent in my sullen/pissy/whatever mood.

started (well, let's say it did anyway) in same dumb class on tuesday.
me and my fuckwit self decided yeah, sure, i can handle doing the body fat testing.
bad idea.
fucking calipers.
i don't know what the overall calculation comes out to.
don't wanna.
so i scratched out all the #s when i adjusted my bench press result today.

all i do know is that it bothered me.
didn't like it.
shouldn't have done it.
and i refuse to even be bothered that it bothers me.
then, in another display of brilliance,
i forgot to pick up my effexor refill on the way home tues.
never left the house wed.
and by this morning, i'm pretty sure i know how a heroin addict fresh into detox feels.
for fucks sake.

i sent my story to C. and naturally the 'bitch' didn't reply.

my mood has nothing to do, however,
with the fact that from mon. 3 days ago,
i'm not seeing pat again until next fri.
i swear it doesn't.
it better fucking not.

one plus w/ the effexor withdrawal tho, is:
i've shit more in the past 2 days than i usually do in a month anymore,
ever since the start of my rectal 'issues'.
i know, i really am so pleasant today, ain't i.


5:41pm
oh, one other thing.
i found out today that the leading cause of death due to smoking
is not lung cancer or emphysema,
but heart disease.
cool, that doesn't sound quite so horrific--
so where do i go to register my selection.

oh, shush.
i amuse myself anyway.

----------

we go to writers club tonight in class.
i printed out a copy of my infamous piece from last term...?
NO, i am NOT gonna have it critiqued again.
no, M., i said NO.

oh, but we do get our pieces back from last week.

i've showed it to a bunch of people:
pat; ro.; 2 aunts (+ grandmother!?--eek.);
left a copy for tacie; fuck C.
lots of thumbs up, including from aunt-c. on the writing specifically.

i'm (a little anxiously) interested in the feedback i'll get from a 'clueless' party...