// 'residential' day 1: fuck.me.
| 01/28/2004 - 10:05 p.m. |

email to C., Wed, 1-28-04, 7:58am, Subject: the minute-by-minute
woulda/coulda/shoulda 'played hooky' again.
but no.
called and said i would be coming, just 1-2 hrs late.
just dug my car out.
gonna shower and stuff now...
and finish *packing*...
and go.

wahhhhhhhhhhhh.

don't know for sure if this thing will even happen today or not
but still wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
and fuckfuckfuckingfuckerfuck

needing some telepathic hugs asap--
m.



11am
I'm here. I don't want to be.
I'm scared shitless.
Skipping group again--"Body Image Art"?--no, I don't fucking think so.
Keep seeing Tacie walk by--fuck me, I "like" her.
As in she said a few words to me 2 different times + I feel that strong wish she'd sit + say more or something.
Fuck me, fuck me, FUCK ME, fuuuuck meeeee.
Scared + lonely + sad + isolating + so more scared + lonely + sad...



schedule
missed: morning gathering
stamped for: menu selection; lunch-mst2; wrap up; dinner-mst2
skipped: body image art; embodiment; 8pm group; relaxation